Tohfa-e-Dulhan Part 99

Main Topic

Etiquettes of written communication between spouses and the fundamental importance of placing one's reliance and expectations solely on Allah Ta'ala in marriage.

Communicating via text messages or WhatsApp during heated marital arguments often leads to misinterpretations, as written words are read according to the recipient's mood.
Proper etiquette when writing letters or messages includes beginning with Bismillah, stating sender and receiver names clearly, offering Salam, noting the Islamic date, and including praise of Allah and Durood upon Rasulullah (Sallallahu alayhi wasallam).
If a written document might be discarded disrespectfully, Bismillah should be recited verbally rather than written down.
Endearing titles and affectionate terms should be used when addressing one's husband rather than formal names.
Spouses should refrain from burdening a traveling partner with minor home issues or demands for gifts, focusing instead on expressing love, seeking forgiveness, and asking for duas.
The root of most domestic disputes lies in placing unmet expectations on people rather than placing ultimate hope and trust in Allah Ta'ala.

Mention of the Hadith stating that the supplications (duas) of a traveler (musafir) are readily accepted by Allah Ta'ala.
Surah Al-Fatihah (1:5): "Iyyaka na'budu wa iyyaka nasta'een" (You alone we worship and You alone we ask for help).
Supplication of Imam Ahmad (Rahimahullah): "O Allah, save my tongue from asking from others just as You have saved my face from turning to others in worship."

Avoid resolving heated arguments over text messages; wait to speak directly in person or verbally.
Make a conscious effort to stay aware of and utilize the Islamic calendar dates in correspondence.
Frame communication with a traveling spouse as a source of emotional comfort and spiritual encouragement.
Place all expectations for support and financial sustenance on Allah Ta'ala alone, recognizing that people are merely temporary custodians of worldly provisions.